you.
“If at some point you’d like to linger in any region, you’re more than
welcome to, but please be advised the tour will have to keep moving if we’re
to finish traveling the world in under eighty minutes. Now, if everyone would
please fasten your seat belts, we’ll take off!”
Everyone buckles up and we set off. I’m no cartographer, but even I
know the destination grid behind each seat—looking similar to the electronic
maps on the subway—isn’t geographically correct. Still, it’s an unbelievable
time with unbelievably convincing replicas in each room, made even better
by Lidia sharing fun facts about each location she learned from her own
studies. We move down a railway where we can see Deckers and guests
enjoying themselves, some even waving at us like we’re not all tourists here.
In London, we pass the Palace of Westminster, where a myth says it’s
illegal to die there, but my favorite part is hearing the bell of Big Ben chime,
even if seeing the hands on the clock snaps me back into reality. In Jamaica,
we’re greeted by dozens of large butterflies, the Giant Swallowtail, as people
sitting on the floor eat special dishes, like ackee and saltfish. In Africa, we
see a giant fish tank with inhabitants from Lake Malawi, and I’m so
enraptured by the blues and yellows swimming around that I almost miss the
live feed on the wall of a lioness carrying her cub by the scruff of its neck. In
Cuba, we see guests competing against Cubans in dominoes, and a line for
sugar cubes, and Rufus cheers for his roots. In Australia, there are exotic
flowers, kite races, and complimentary koala plush toys for any children. In
Iraq, the sounds of the national bird, the chucker partridge, play over the
speakers discreetly hidden behind the merchant carts offering beautiful silk
scarves and shirts. In Colombia, Lidia tells us about the country’s perpetual
summer, and we’re tempted to grab a drink from the juice vendors. In Egypt,
there are only two pyramid replicas, and since the room has a dry heat, the
employees are offering Nile River–brand water bottles. In China, Lidia jokes
about how she heard reincarnation is forbidden here without government
permission, and I don’t want to think about that so I focus on the lit-up
skyscraper replicas and people playing table tennis. In South Korea, we see a
couple of orange-yellow robots used in classrooms—“robo-teachers,” they’re
called—and Deckers having their faces made up. In Puerto Rico, the trolley
stops for its forty-second break. Rufus tugs at my arm and ushers me
elsewhere, Lidia following.